The First Method: Turning Your Hostility Inward

With the office situation, maybe you begin thinking, “Why am I always the first person everyone dumps on when anything goes wrong around here?  What a loser they must all think I am. Not even my boss came to my rescue and I worked so hard on that project.”

Should you choose this avenue, you’ll become depressed and begin feeling like a victim in your own life. When people become depressed enough, they become very disillusioned and may think of committing suicide. Unfortunately, there are times when people do commit suicide. While some introspection is necessary to determine your role in a problem situation, obviously, this is not a good method to use when dealing with anger.

Depression is the result of holding a lot of angry feelings inside. Not only is this unhealthy, it is also dangerous. Young people who turn out to be serial killers are described by friends and neighbors as such “nice, quiet boys”.  It is only then, after the killing spree, that we realize how much anger those kids must have been holding inside.

Co‑workers who go postal are said to have just snapped. Well, all this hostility and acting out didn’t just happen out of the blue. You can bet that the situation had been building up for a long time. Then, when the person’s internal pressure cooker couldn’t hold any more, he or she acted out their anger (rage) by coming to work with a gun and killing people.

Therefore, the next time you are feeling down about some situation, ask yourself, “What am I so angry about?” because that’s what’s really going on with you.  Then, when you get to the answer, ask yourself another question – an action question such as, “What am I going to do about this situation?”